Philippe Leroyer | Flickr (CC BY-NC-ND 2.0)

Women Human Rights Defenders

WHRDs are self-identified women and lesbian, bisexual, transgender, queer and intersex (LBTQI) people and others who defend rights and are subject to gender-specific risks and threats due to their human rights work and/or as a direct consequence of their gender identity or sexual orientation.

WHRDs are subject to systematic violence and discrimination due to their identities and unyielding struggles for rights, equality and justice.

The WHRD Program collaborates with international and regional partners as well as the AWID membership to raise awareness about these risks and threats, advocate for feminist and holistic measures of protection and safety, and actively promote a culture of self-care and collective well being in our movements.


Risks and threats targeting WHRDs  

WHRDs are exposed to the same types of risks that all other defenders who defend human rights, communities, and the environment face. However, they are also exposed to gender-based violence and gender-specific risks because they challenge existing gender norms within their communities and societies.

By defending rights, WHRDs are at risk of:

  • Physical assault and death
  • Intimidation and harassment, including in online spaces
  • Judicial harassment and criminalization
  • Burnout

A collaborative, holistic approach to safety

We work collaboratively with international and regional networks and our membership

  • to raise awareness about human rights abuses and violations against WHRDs and the systemic violence and discrimination they experience
  • to strengthen protection mechanisms and ensure more effective and timely responses to WHRDs at risk

We work to promote a holistic approach to protection which includes:

  • emphasizing the importance of self-care and collective well being, and recognizing that what care and wellbeing mean may differ across cultures
  • documenting the violations targeting WHRDs using a feminist intersectional perspective;
  • promoting the social recognition and celebration of the work and resilience of WHRDs ; and
  • building civic spaces that are conducive to dismantling structural inequalities without restrictions or obstacles

Our Actions

We aim to contribute to a safer world for WHRDs, their families and communities. We believe that action for rights and justice should not put WHRDs at risk; it should be appreciated and celebrated.

  • Promoting collaboration and coordination among human rights and women’s rights organizations at the international level to  strengthen  responses concerning safety and wellbeing of WHRDs.

  • Supporting regional networks of WHRDs and their organizations, such as the Mesoamerican Initiative for WHRDs and the WHRD Middle East and North Africa  Coalition, in promoting and strengthening collective action for protection - emphasizing the establishment of solidarity and protection networks, the promotion of self-care, and advocacy and mobilization for the safety of WHRDs;

  • Increasing the visibility and recognition of  WHRDs and their struggles, as well as the risks that they encounter by documenting the attacks that they face, and researching, producing, and disseminating information on their struggles, strategies, and challenges:

  • Mobilizing urgent responses of international solidarity for WHRDs at risk through our international and regional networks, and our active membership.

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Snippet FEA Story 1 Maps Economies of Care (FR)

Fond bordeaux avec les cartes du Brésil en blanc, de l'Espagne en jaune moutarde, et de la Colombie en rose

La historia de Crear, Résister, Transform por Coumba Toure

Una experiencia mágica de narración feminista conducida por la feminista panafricana Coumba Toure, quien actuará en la antigua tradición de lxs griots de África Occidental.

Y nos reunimos nuevamente
Juntamos nuestras historias, nuestra fuerza
nuestras canciones
nuestras lágrimas
nuestra ira
nuestros sueños
nuestro éxito
nuestros fracasos
Y lo colocamos todo junto
en un gran cuenco para compartir
durante una luna de pensamientos
Y nos mantenemos en contacto
nos sacudimos las mentes unas a otras
nos acariciamos las almas 
mientras nuestras manos siguen atadas
y nuestros besos y abrazos están prohibidos
Sin embargo, nos hacemos más fuertes cada hora
entretejiendo juntas nuestras voces
cruzando las barreras del sonido
mientras hablamos en lenguas
 
Nuestras voces son cada vez más altas
Sabemos lo que nos diferencia de otras personas
y entre nosotras, de modo que
estamos bordando nuestras bellezas en un mosaico de pensamientos
desde nuestros aprendizajes más profundos, desde nuestros poderes
A veces nos rodea el terror
la confusión, la deshonestidad
pero nos lavamos en el océano de amor
Somos tejedoras de sueños
para vestir nuestro nuevo mundo
hilo por hilo
tan pequeñas como somos
como pequeñas hormigas construyendo nuestro movimiento
comopequeñas gotas construyendo nuestros ríos
Damos pasos hacia adelante y pasos hacia atrás
bailando nuestro camino de vuelta a la cordura
Sostenemos el ritmo de nuestros corazones: sigan
latiendo, por favor, no se detengan
Y aquí estamos, transmisoras de generosidad olvidada
gota tras gota creciendo como el océano
creciendo como el río que fluye de nuestras almas
mostrando nuestra fuerza para ser el agua
que limpiará este mundo
y nos estamos reuniendo nuevamente ¿pueden sentirnos?
Mentiría si dijera que para mí
está bien no verlas, extraño a mi gente
Extraño su contacto y
sus voces sin filtro y sin registro
Extraño nuestros susurros y nuestros alaridos
nuestros gritos de la revolución abortada
Solo queremos parir nuevos mundos
Entonces luchemos para borrar las fronteras entre nosotras
Por favor, no se detengan

FRMag - My queer Ramadan

Mon Ramadan queer

par Amal Amer

Je prie en famille pour la première fois en six ans, recouvert.e d’un keffieh que j’ai déniché dans une poubelle.  (...)

Lire

illustration : « Les anges aussi sortent la nuit », par Chloé Luu >

Body

Snippet - WITM Our objectives - RU

Задачи исследования «Где деньги?»:

1

Предоставить членам AWID, партнерам и донорам обновленный, мощный, основанный на фактических данных и ориентированный на конкретные действия анализ ресурсных реалий феминистских движений, а также текущего состояния экосистемы финансирования феминистских инициатив.

2

Выявить и продемонстрировать возможности для увеличения и улучшения финансирования феминистских организаций, выявить ошибочные решения и препятствовать тенденциям, приводящим к нехватке финансирования и/или противоречащим гендерной справедливости и межсекторальным феминистским повесткам.

3

Сформулировать феминистское видение, предложения и программы по обеспечению ресурсами.

Пройти опрос!

Aïssata Kane

Aïssata Kane, surnommée affectueusement “Yaye Kadia” (Mère Kadia), a de tout temps été une féministe engagée dans la défense des droits des femmes africaines, et particulièrement mauritaniennes.

Au cours de sa carrière politique, en 1975, elle fut nommée ministre de la protection de la famille et des affaires sociales et travailla avec ardeur à l’amélioration du statut des femmes dans son pays; c’était la première fois qu'une femme occupait un tel poste.   

Ce travail consista notamment à promouvoir l’éducation des filles et des femmes, à lutter contre la pratique du gavage sur les jeunes femmes, à faire pression pour l’inclusion d’une disposition sur les droits maritaux et à plaider en faveur de la création d’un quota de représentation féminine au Parlement.  

“[Aïssata] a réalisé toutes ses passions avec humilité, courage et détermination. Elle ne voulait déranger personne avec ce combat qu’elle menait sur tous les fronts à la fois.” Ball Halimata Dem, la nièce d’Aïssata

Ayant fondé l'Union nationale des femmes de Mauritanie (UNFM), elle avait cocréé et publié pour elles le magazine Marienou, dédié à l’émancipation des femmes mauritaniennes. Aïssata dirigea également plusieurs organisations sous-régionales et locales, notamment en tant que présidente de l'Association internationale des femmes francophones (AIFF) et, en écologiste résolue, fut présidente de l'Association pour la protection de l'environnement en Mauritanie (APEM). 

En 2018, on lui décerna le Prix de la Femme africaine pionnière. Ce prix honore son engagement à faire progresser le statut de la femme en Mauritanie et reconnaît son grand leadership et son sens de l'innovation.

Aïssata est décédée le 10 août 2019. 

Snippet - Podcast Playlist Season 1 (EN)

MANGO

Jurema Araújo Portrait

Jurema Araújo is a teacher-poet from Rio de Janeiro. She contributed to the magazine Urbana, edited by the poets Brasil Barreto and Samaral (RIP) and to the book Amor e outras revoluções (Love and Other Revolutions) with several other writers. In collaboration with Angélica Ferrarez and Fabiana Pereira, she co-edited O livro negro dos sentidos (The Black Book of Senses), a creative anthology on black women’s sexuality in Brazil. Jurema is 54-years-old; she has a daughter, three dogs, a cat, and many friends.

Mango Cover

Suck it with me? 

Mango is my favorite fruit.
I open my mouth
and suck it all,
Its flesh caught between my teeth
that turn soft not to hurt it
and I press it between my tongue and the roof of my mouth,
then I take it out to suck on every part of it
with the juice running down my mouth
drenching myself in this tasty nectar
and putting it all in my mouth again
because mango is seed and honey;
it is fiber and flavor.
And when it is over, I am entranced,
honeydewed, sweetened,
my lips all wet.
Ohhh, what is mango for if not for smearing.

Chupa Comigo? 

A fruta que eu mais gosto é manga!
Porque eu abro a boca
E meto toda pra chupar!
Se os dentes a prendem
Fazem macio para não machucar
E eu pressiono entre minha língua e meu céu
Depois tiro pra sugar cada parte
Sentindo o caldo escorrer boca afora
Me molhando com esse néctar gostoso
E metendo toda na boca de novo
Pois manga é caroço e é mel,
É fiapo e sabor
E quando acaba, estou extasiada
Melada, docinha
Com os lábios molhados!
Aaahhh, manga é pra se lambuzar!


Introducing The Black Book of Senses

I’ll admit it: when Angélica and Fabi invited me to curate a collection of erotic texts by black women, I didn’t know what curatorship was. I understood the erotic well, but curatorship... I smiled, feeling shy and flattered. I think I thanked them – at least I hope I did – and thought to myself: what the fuck is it?! This fancy word I’ll have to learn the meaning of while doing it, what is it?

Now at this point, I know what it is to be a curator: it is making love with someone else’s texts, with someone else’s art, with the intention of putting a book together. And that is exactly what I did. I undressed each text of every author of this book with a literary lasciviousness. And I got involved in the words and senses of others. I was penetrated by poems I didn’t write; tales I didn’t even dare to imagine turned me upside down, messing with my feelings, with my libido. And it was a wonderful and unusual orgasm: ethereal, corporeal, sublime, at once intellectual and sensitive.
These texts pulsated like a clit hardened by desire, drenched, dripping joy in every reading. Words that swallowed me with their naughty significance, making me dive deeper into this wet universe. 

These black women went to the bottom of their arousals and turned their deepest erotic fantasies into art. These works are impregnated with each writer’s own way of experiencing sexuality: freely, blackly, for ourselves, in our own way, empowered.

I chose to spread the texts throughout different parts of the book, each one organized according to the most delicate, explosive, evident, or implicit content they presented.

To open the door to this “invulved blackessence,” we have our Preliminaries section, with texts that introduce readers to this world of delights. It is a more general, delicate caress to acknowledge the subjects addressed by the texts in the rest of the book.

Then comes the heat of Touch, addressing what the skin can feel. That energy which burns or freezes our bodies, makes our hormones explode and starts to awaken the other senses. And although there are many of us who are voyeurs, the contact of skin with a wet and warm mouth is exciting, like wandering through the softness of whomever is with you. We are seduced by the firm or gentle touch that gives us goosebumps and that lovely discomfort that runs from the neck down to the back and only stops the next day. And the warmth of the lips, the mouth, the wet tongue on the skin – oh, the tongue in the ear, hmmm – or skin on skin, clothes moving over the body, almost like an extension of the other’s hand. If there is no urgency, that wildest arousal of the pressure of a tight grab, a bit of pain – or a lot, who knows?

The Sound – or melody? – section shows us that attraction also happens through hearing: the voice, the whispers, the music that enables the connection between the bodies and can become the theme of desire. For some of us, someone with a beautiful voice would only need their vocal cords, because that harsh or heavy or melodious sound would be auditory sex. Their loud swearing or sweet words whispered in the ear would be enough to give us hair-raising shivers from neck to coccyx.

Decorative element


In Flavor, we know the tongue does a good job tasting the most hidden places and wandering through the body to delight itself. Sometimes this organ is used, boldly, to taste the other’s nectar. The idea of someone sharing their strawberry or a delicious, juicy mango through bites and licks – or licks and bites – melts us. But nothing is more delicious than tasting the caves and hills of the person you are with. Stick your tongue deep inside to taste a piece of fruit... or spend hours tasting the head of a cock in your mouth, or suck on a delicious breast to taste the nipples. This is all about memorizing someone by their Flavor.

There are texts in which the nose is what triggers desire. The Smell, my dear readers, can awaken us to the delights of desire. Sometimes we meet a person who smells so good, we want to swallow them right through our nose. When you run through the other person’s body with your nose, starting with the neck – wow, that delightfully uncomfortable shiver that runs down the spine and undresses the soul! The shameless nose then moves to the back of the neck and captures the scent of the other in such a way that in the absence of that person, smelling their same scent evokes, or conversely, invades in us olfactory memories that bring the arousing smell of that person back.

We then get to Look – for me, the betrayer of senses – in which we perceive desire from a point of “view.” It is through sight that the texts present desire and arousal, through which the other senses are brought about. Sometimes a smile is all it takes to drive us crazy. The exchange of glances? That look that says “I want you now.” That look of possession that comes to an end when you stop fucking, or not. That one is very particular; it draws the other who won’t be able to look away for long. Or the sidelong glance – when one looks away when the other turns their head, like a cat-and-mouse game? Once we are caught red-handed, there’s nothing else to do besides breaking into a wide smile.

Finally, the explosion. Wandering through All senses, the texts mix feelings that seem like an alert, so there is the greatest pleasure, that orgasm.

Of course, there is nothing explicitly separating these poems and tales. Some are subtle. Arousal engages all our senses and, most importantly, our heads. That’s where it happens, and it connects our whole body. I organized the poems according to how they came to me in each reading. Feel free to disagree! But to me, there is a sense through which desire goes and then explodes. Realizing which one it is, is delightful. 

Being able to turn arousal into art means freeing ourselves from all the prejudice, prisons, and stigma this white-centric society has trapped us in.

Every time a black writer transforms the erotic into art, she breaks these harmful racist chains that cripple her body, repress her sexuality, and turn us into the object of another’s greed. Writing erotic poetry is taking back the power over her own body and roaming fearlessly through the delights of desire for herself, for others, for life.

The literary erotic is who we are when turned into art. Here we show the best of us, our views of love drenched by pleasure, seasoned by the erogenous, spread through our bodies, and translated by our artistic consciousness. We are multiple and we share this multiplicity of sensations in words dripping with arousal. Yes, even our words drip with our sexual desire, drenching our verses, turning our sexual urges into paragraphs. To come, for us, is a breakthrough.

It is necessary to make our minds, bodies, and sexuality black, to reestablish our pleasure, and take back our orgasms. Only then will we be free. This whole process is a breakthrough, and it happens painfully. But there is happiness in finding ourselves to be very different from where we had been placed. 

I feel like I am yours, I am ours. Taste, delight yourselves, feast on these beautiful words with us. 


This text is adapted from the introductions to “O Livro Negro Dos Sentidos” [The Black Book of Senses], an erotic collection of poems by 23 black female writers.
 

Cover image for Communicating Desire
 
Explore Transnational Embodiments

This journal edition in partnership with Kohl: a Journal for Body and Gender Research, will explore feminist solutions, proposals and realities for transforming our current world, our bodies and our sexualities.

Explore

Cover image, woman biting a fruit
 

التجسيدات العابرة للحدود

نصدر النسخة هذه من المجلة بالشراكة مع «كحل: مجلة لأبحاث الجسد والجندر»، وسنستكشف عبرها الحلول والاقتراحات وأنواع الواقع النسوية لتغيير عالمنا الحالي وكذلك أجسادنا وجنسانياتنا.

استكشف المجلة

FRMag - Mainstreaming The Invisible

Mainstreaming The Invisible Feminist Realities

by Dr. Pragati Singh

In 2019, I was invited by the BBC to speak at the 100 women conference in Delhi, India, on the subject of ‘The future of love, relationships, and families.’ The audience seated in the large hall consisted mostly of young Indians- college students, professionals, activists etc (...)

Read

artwork: “Angels go out at night too” by Chloé Luu >

لماذا عليّ أن أفكر بتعبئة الاستطلاع؟

هنالك العديد من الأسباب لتعبئة الاستطلاع منها أنه لديك الفرصة لمشاركة تجربتك المعاشة المتعلقة بحشد الموارد لدعم تنظيمك، أن تعمل/ين من منطلق قوة كخبير/ة بما يتعلق بالأموال ولأين تتحرك ولأين تصل وبذلك المشاركة بالجهد المشترك والمناصرة لتحريك التمويلات الأكبر والأفضل. لقد أثبت استطلاع "أين المال" في العشرين عام الأخيرة أنه مصدر أساسي للشركاء/ الشريكات وكذلك للممولين/ات. ندعوك من كل قلبنا للمشاركة بالنسخة الثالثة لتسليط الضوء على الوضع الفعلي للموارد، وتحد الحلول الخاطئة، والإشارة إلى كيفية تغيير التمويل حتى تزدهر الحركات وتواجه التحديات المعقدة في عصرنا.

Barbara Allimadi

Barbara Allimadi was a political and human rights activist from Uganda. In 2012, she co-organized a protest against a televised police assault of Ingrid Turinawe, an opposition politician who had her breast squeezed by a police officer.

During the protest, Barbara, along with other fellow activists stripped to their bras in front of the Central Police Station in Kampala. This came to be known as the infamous ‘bra protest’ in Uganda.

“We settled on the bra protest. We thought it would be most appropriate for what had happened. It’s not like we were saying we don’t respect ourselves. We were disgusted by what had been done.” - Barbara Allimadi, 2013 (Daily Monitor)

With a Degree in Electronics and Communications Engineering from the London Metropolitan University, Barbara was a network engineer in the United Kingdom and an avid fan of reggae music. She returned to Uganda In 2007, when her mother passed away.

In 2019, she was appointed Coordinator for International and Diaspora Affairs at the Alliance for National Transformation (ANT), a political party launched that year by an opposition leader.

“We want security of life and property, not pain, injury and even death at the hands of security forces who are meant to protect us. Most importantly, we want a stable and enabling environment where we can realize our dreams and aspirations.” - Barbara Allimadi, ANT video

Barbara passed away on 27 April 2020. 


Tributes:

“I was so proud of my sister for many things but in particular her fearless pursuit of peace, democracy, justice and equality in Uganda. At the height of her activism she led many marches on the streets of Kampala, to police stations, and Parliament.” - Doris Allimadi, Barbara’s sister

“It is with deep sadness that we have learnt of the untimely passing of Barbara Allimadi. She has been a valiant, relentless and courageous force for the liberation movement of Uganda. Our deepest condolences to her family. She will be sorely missed.” - Akina Mama wa Afrika (tweet on 28 April 2020)

“The passing on of Barbara is so sad for us and her entire family. She dedicated herself to fighting for justice, freedom and rights of others while serving in the civil society until she recently joined us at the party.” Maj Gen Mugisha Muntu, ANT national coordinator

“A beautiful, charming, funny, charismatic and inspirational sister. My children lost their aunty. Uganda lost a brave and courageous freedom fighter. Barbara once said, ‘As long as there is still breath in you, keep working towards your dreams.’” - Doris Allimadi, Barbara’s sister

Snippet Forum Stories Story 1 (EN)

Case study 1 - Three Boats, a Horse and a Taxi: Pacific Feminists at the AWID Forums

This story is about how an increasingly diverse group of feminists from the Pacific organized through the years to attend the AWID Forums and how that process changed them personally, as organizations, and as a movement through what they learned, discovered and experienced. It illustrates the importance of the Forums as a space through which a region that tends to be marginalized or ignored at the global level can build a strong presence in the feminist movement that is then replicated at other international women’s rights spaces.

A Collective Love Print

The Circle’s Conspiracy of Writers | Wazina Zondon

Decorative element
Teta Research Network
Wazina Zondon Portrait
Also known as the Teta Research Network, The Conspiracy of Writers was founded in 2021 in the context of Kohl’s weekly writing circles. The Network is a transnational group of queer and feminist writers who engage in collective writing, thinking, and world-making.  Wazina Zondon is an Afghan raised in New York City. Her storycollecting and storytelling work centers collective memories and rites of passage in the diaspora. Currently, she is working on Faith: in Love/faith in love which (re)traces her parent’s love story and family’s inherited love print.

 

Love is a contraband in Hell,
cause love is acid
that eats away bars. 

But you, me, and tomorrow
hold hands and make vows
that struggle will multiply.

The hacksaw has two blades.
The shotgun has two barrels.
We are pregnant with freedom.
We are a conspiracy.

It is our duty to fight for freedom.
It is our duty to win.
We must love each other and support each other.
We have nothing to lose but our chains.

- “Love” by Assata Shakur

Cover for article A Collective Love Print showing two people kissing

“If we can inherit trauma, can we inherit an imprint related to love?”

That is the question Wazina Zondon asks in her collective memoir Loveprint. Loveprint is a wandering, an overlap, a deviation that (re)creates, at the intersection of interviews and personal essays, our family’s stories and insights on love, partnership and romance. Under Wazina’s guidance, the circle’s conspiracy of writers came together and attempted to reproduce this literal blueprint in the form of collective writing, where our different stories, our genders and sexual identities complement and contradict each other. With our voices overlapping, we complete each other’s sentences to create a conversation, a memorial, pieces of ourselves that speak to a “we.”

What are the origins of your love print?

I am a so-called “happy accident.” There is much narration about this – an accidental life, one that is entirely wanted at the same time. I feel this shaped my way of loving, I don’t just fall in love; I risk the slips that lead to the fall. Perhaps it made me an amor fati kind of person. 

I was told that I was an unwanted child. So I grew up to become an unwanted adult. The origins of my love print are based on being eternally unwelcomed. I am not a fruit of love or any happy feelings but rather one pain and burden. I don’t have a love print – at least not in this sense.

I know for a fact that both my parents were in love at some point, but mental health is such a demon, and until one confronts their demons, there is no winning.

I will never associate “love” with my parents or normative family. Love growing up was full of violence and responsibilities I didn’t sign up for or was even ready for. For the longest time, it felt like life and love were about carrying a big rock uphill. While my parents “loved each other,” it was a toxic ethos of violence, jealousy, and insecurity to grow up in. I grew up wanting to crave stability, and this is what is me now. I am a risk taker, but never in my “love space.”

I don’t know why my mother chose to host a child (me) within her.
She does not love in this form.

My mother tells me that if I have to think about “finding” love, I should never look at her marriage as a template. My love print comes instead from my raising dogs for the last two decades (18 years to be precise). The other way around is true as well – they raised me. I understand more and more about love and its many layers in their company.

I haven’t known love from a “print.” In our household we don’t talk about love. I had to teach myself how to love. It was hard work. Still, I fail and still, I keep on trying and I fail everyday. Perhaps failure is my love print.

My love print is the care, warmth, and understanding I give to others
surrounding me, whether a stranger, a friend, a relative, a lover. 
My love print is political – uncalculated and unthought of.

I was born under heavy shelling. 
My love print is the negative 
print of that.

Lessons learned about love

I know more about what love is not than I know about what love is. 

Love is neither anxiety nor panic.

Love is not asking permission to live or breathe. It is always about love and there is no love without freedom.

Everything you do is about using your heart except love. Love is about using your mind. 

Sometimes I fear that my love language is lost in translation.

--- There are many ways
to map the origins
of how to
how not to
love
not love
love just enough
love far too much
some love
some loss
to love
to love lost ---


I cannot stand the idea of the couple. I cannot stand the idea of living alone while aging either. I am tired of doing the chores alone, moving houses alone, paying rent and bills alone... I imagine getting a stroke alone, and it scares me. I have no plan of “partnering up.” I want a world where I can get married to a friend, buy a house with a friend, not have sex.

Loving many does not corrupt a love shared between two, and whether love is romantic or not is really not that important.

When I reflect on the shoddy state of my relationships, I realize that I am in the relationship I was trained to be in. With all my “radicalness” I have not yet unlearned shitty gendered norms.

My need for stability feels “not radical” enough. I want to get out of this labeling. I want something I never had. I want to make it beautiful. I want to feel beautiful and safe – and only stability makes me feel that. Safe, sound, knowing home is neither about violence nor strife.

 

--- Love print – love to smell the books to see 
where they were printed
I try to think of the origin of my 
understanding and practice of love
Do we need origin, it is not the same as purity? 
No purity or origin of love. 
Why is it understanding and practice, 
and not “emotion” that comes to mind? ---

 


When I call my parents, I don’t hang up the phone after we’ve said
goodbye, so I can hear the sounds of home.

What do we need to be/feel loved in death?

During my Sunni burial, I want all the women and men to come together for my burial. What’s with not being able to go say goodbye to dead people from a different sex? It will be Sunni because my mother would want it to be. It will be eco-friendly; no need for the headstone. I love all burial rituals. Quran is good, but I also want music. I really like Asmahan, Um Kulthum, and The Stone Roses.

I have a Monday-Friday playlist and two different ones for the weekend: one for Saturday and one for Sunday playlist. I would like those who loved me to play the music that I used to listen to, respecting the days – with some margin of tolerance as long as they stick to the playlists.

I want to be surrounded by the one(s) who have loved me, even for a moment. And in music and embowered in fresh cut flowers. I don’t want to be discovered dead; I want to pass away mid-laugh with loved ones.

I want to be remembered as someone who loved.

I don’t need to feel loved in death. I need the people around me to feel I loved them, even after I die. Being loved in death is about those who are alive. So I think more about how we come together as a living and loving community in the death of those we love and live with. How we take their memories with us. How we become archives of their lives.

 --- Sometimes, you can only love people in their death. ---

I have to think back to the body being connected to a space. My family is very tiny and although we come from different places, it is as if every generation moved somewhere new. Perhaps this is the reason why death is not connected to a special place, a cemetery. It is common in our family to bury the dead without names or gravestones, or to distribute the ashes in the wind. I feel at peace with this kind of spaceless remembrance. The idea that my ashes fertilize new life gives me the sense of being loved, being remembered through recreation. My grandmother died earlier this year due to complications after the vaccination. Two hours after she died, my family sat laughing tears about her jokes, her hilarious way to tell stories. We laughed and loved, and it was as though she sat with us again. This is what would make me feel at peace – fertilizing soil, fertilizing conversations, and collective remembrance.

--- There were
Two streets that I used 
To walk
To run
To play
To stay

There were 
Five hours when the sun
Was hot
The sky was blue
The earth was green

There was 
A flower I could
Smell
Touch
Squeeze
Crush

There were
The friends I could
Caress
The food
I could 
inhale
The language
That would roll off my
lips

There might still be

Those many places

And things

And people

After me  ---

Perhaps a promise that I will be “spatially commemorated” as a plant and taken care of in turns until it becomes a tree is enough. No name, no plaques – just the plant/tree, and knowing that it will be cared for. As for my body, I want to be cremated without any rituals and my bone ashes set free in the Arabian sea.

I need my body to be treated as subversively as it’s lived.

I do not want to be buried next to my family. In this tiny drawer next to all of the people who never knew me. Trapped in death as I was in life. I want to be cremated, and my ashes finally set free. 

I want to be allowed to pass, not hang in the in-between, so it is a presence, an active process, a trespassing.

I will ask of you: 

  • To release me and let me pass
  • To not let nostalgia muddy this moment because I will ask only for the normalcy of your expressions
  • I have snuck the gentle glimpses and hoarded away the already small and large ways you loved me in order to be sustained. I kept myself alive on these
  • To set a finite amount of time to grieve
  • To be be reminded there is no separation in the beauty of loving; it is infinite and it regenerates without the body

I want to be remembered for the love I put into the world.
I want my body to be given away, and my organs
to further fuel love in (an)other live(s).


--- The smell of jasmine ---


 

Cover image for Communicating Desire
 
Explore Transnational Embodiments

This journal edition in partnership with Kohl: a Journal for Body and Gender Research, will explore feminist solutions, proposals and realities for transforming our current world, our bodies and our sexualities.

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Cover image, woman biting a fruit
 

التجسيدات العابرة للحدود

نصدر النسخة هذه من المجلة بالشراكة مع «كحل: مجلة لأبحاث الجسد والجندر»، وسنستكشف عبرها الحلول والاقتراحات وأنواع الواقع النسوية لتغيير عالمنا الحالي وكذلك أجسادنا وجنسانياتنا.

استكشف المجلة

FRMag - Between Two Worlds

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por Haddy Jatou Gassama

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arte: «Sacred Puta» [Puta sagrada], Pia Love >

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Да! Мы признаем и ценим различные причины, по которым феминистки(-ты), работающие в различных контекстах, не имеют внешнего финансирования. Эти причины могут разниться: от невозможности подавать заявки на гранты из-за несоответствия требованиями и/или невозможности получения денег из-за рубежа, до использования генерируемых автономно ресурсов, в качестве самостоятельной политической стратегии. Мы хотим услышать ваше мнение, независимо от наличия или отсутствия у вас опыта работы с внешним финансированием.