Communicating Desire

and Other Embodied Political Praxes

Communicating Desire

Host: We tend to think about communicating desire as something that is limited to the private intimacy of the bedroom and our personal relationships. But can we also think of this kind of communication as a structure, a praxis that informs our work, and how we are, how we do in the world?

Lindiwe
I believe that unfortunately in the past, expressing your sexuality has been limited. You were allowed to express it within the confines of your marriage, which was permitted, there have always been taboo and stigmas attached to expressing it any other way. When it comes to communicating, obviously the fact that certain stigmas are attached to expressing your sexuality or expressing your desire makes it a lot harder to communicate that in the bedroom or intimately with your partner. From my personal experience, I do believe that obviously if I feel more comfortable expressing myself outside of the bedroom on other matters or other topics, it’s easier for me to build that trust, because you understand conflict resolution with that particular person, you understand exactly how to make your communication special towards that particular person. It’s not easy. It’s something that is consistently done throughout whatever your engagement is, whether it’s your relationship or whether it’s casual and just in the moment. But I believe that confidence outside can definitely translate to how you communicate your desire.

Manal
Since childhood, a woman is raised with that, “you’re not allowed to talk about your body, you’re not allowed to talk about your desire,” which puts a heavy responsibility on women, especially girls in their teens when they need to express themselves and talk about these issues. So for me I think this is a big problem. You know, I have been married for more than 25 years, but still, until now, I cannot talk about my desires. I cannot say what I want or what I prefer, because it’s like I’m not allowed to go beyond this line. It’s like haram, despite it being my right. This is the case for all my friends, they just can’t express themselves in the right way.

Louise
Personally, I find that expressing our desires, my desires, however that expression comes in hand, has to do with the other, and the gaze that the other would have on me. So this is also something that we can link to cinema. And the gaze I would have on myself as well: what I think I am as an individual, but also what society expects of me and my sexuality. In the past, I somehow did the analogy between what happens in the bedroom and what happens in the workplace, because there is sometimes this dynamic of power, whether I want it or not. And oftentimes, verbal communication is harder than we think. But when it comes to representation in film, that’s a totally different game. We are very far away from what I guess all of us here would like to see on screen when it comes to just communicating sexual desires inside or outside the bedroom. 

Online and Embodied

Host: We can think about the digital world as embodied: while it might be virtual, it is not less real. And this was made clear in the context of AWID’s feminist realities festival, which took place entirely online. What does it mean then to talk about sexuality, collectively, politically, in online spaces? Do we navigate virtual spaces with our bodies and affects, and in this case, what are the different considerations? What does it do to communication and representation?

Lindiwe
Social media makes you feel community-based. When you express what it is that you want or like, there is someone who’s either going to agree or disagree, but those who do agree make you feel that you belong to a community. So it’s easier to throw it out into the universe, or for others to see, and potentially not get as much judgment. And I say this very loosely because sometimes, depending on what it is that you’re expressing, it either will get you vilified or celebrated. But when it comes to the bedroom, there is an intimacy and almost a vulnerability that is exposing you and different parts of you that is not as easy to give your opinion on. When it comes to expressing your desire, speaking it and saying it and maybe putting a Tweet or a social media post, or even liking and reading other communities that are same-minded is a lot easier than telling your partner, “this is how I want to be pleasured” or “this is how what I want you to do next,” because of the fear of rejection. But not only that, just the vulnerability aspect – allowing yourself to be bare enough to let the other person see into what you are thinking, feeling, and wanting – I think this is where the difference would come in for me personally. I feel it is a lot more community-based on social media, and it’s easier to engage in discourse. Whereas in the bedroom, you don’t want to necessarily kill the moment. But I think that also kind of helps you understand going forward, depending on the relationship with the person, how you would engage thereafter. So I always know that if I try to communicate something and I fail to do so in the moment, I can always try to bring it up outside of that moment and see what the reaction would be so I know how to approach it going forward.

Louise
You know the question in films is, I don’t know if the male gaze is done intentionally or not. Like we don’t really know that. What we know is that the reason why sexuality in general has been so heternormative and focused on penetration and not giving any space for women to actually ask for anything in films, is because most of the people who have been working in this industry and making decisions in terms of, you know, storytelling and editing have been white men. So rape revenge is this very weird film genre that was birthed in the 70s, and half of the story would be that a woman is being raped by one or multiple people, and in the other half, she would get her revenge. So usually she would murder and kill the people who have raped her, and sometimes other people next to them. At the beginning of the birth of this genre and for 30 years at least, those films were written, produced, and directed by men. This is why we also want so much representation. A lot of feminists and pioneers in queer filmmaking also used the act of filming in order to do that and to reclaim their own sexuality. I’m thinking about Barbara Hammer, who’s a feminist and queer pioneer in experimental cinema in the U.S. where she decided to shoot women having sex on 16mm, and by doing so reclaimed a space within the narrative that was exposed in film at that time. And there is also then the question of invisibilization: we know now, because of the internet and sharing knowledge, that women and queer filmmakers have been trying and making films since the beginning of cinema. We only realize it now that we have access to databases and the work of activists and curators and filmmakers.

Resisting Colonization

Host: And this opens up the conversation on the importance of keeping our feminist histories alive. The online worlds have also played a crucial role in documenting protests and resistance. From Sudan to Palestine to Colombia, feminists have taken our screens by storm, challenging the realities of occupation, capitalism, and oppression. So could we speak of communicating desire – the desire for something else – as decolonization?

Manal
Maybe because my village is just 600 residents and the whole village is one family – Tamimi – there are no barriers between men and women. We do everything together. So when we began our non-violent resistance or when we joined the non-violent resistance in Palestine, there was no discussion whether women should participate or not. We took a very important role within the movement here in the village. But when other villages and other places began to join our weekly protests, some men thought that if these women participate or join the protests, they will fight with soldiers so it will be like they’re easy women. There were some men who were not from the village who tried to sexually harass the women. But a strong woman who is able to stand in front of a soldier can also stand against sexual harassment. Sometimes, when other women from other places join our protest, they are shy at first; they don’t want to come closer because there are many men. If you want to join the protest, if you want to be part of the non-violent movement, you have to remove all these restrictions and all these thoughts from your mind. You have to focus on just fighting for your rights. Unfortunately, the Israeli occupation realizes this issue. For example, the first time I was arrested, I wear the hijab so they tried to take it off; they tried to take off my clothes, in front of everybody. There were like 300-400 people and they tried to do it. When they took me to the interrogation, the interrogator said: “we did this because we want to punish other women through you. We know your culture.” So I told him: “I don’t care, I did something that I believe in. Even if you take all my clothes off, everybody knows that Manal is resisting.”

Lindiwe
I think even from a cultural perspective, which is very ironic, if you look at culture in Africa, prior to getting colonized, showing skin wasn’t a problem. Wearing animal skin and/or hides to protect you, that wasn’t an issue and people weren’t as sexualized unless it was within context. But we conditioned ourselves to say, “you should be covered up” and the moment you are not covered up you are exposed, and therefore it will be sexualized. Nudity gets sexualized as opposed to you just being naked; they don’t want a little girl to be seen naked. What kind of society have we conditioned ourselves to be if you’re going to be sexualizing someone who is naked outside of the context of a sexual engagement? But environment definitely plays a big role because your parents and your grannies and your aunts say “no, don’t dress inappropriately,” or “no, that’s too short.” So you hear that at home first, and then the moment you get exposed outside, depending on the environment, whether it’s a Eurocentric or more westernized environment to what you are used to, then you are kind of free to do so. And even then, as much as you are free, there’s still a lot that comes with it in terms of catcalling and people still sexualizing your body. You could be wearing a short skirt, and someone feels they have the right to touch you without your permission. There is so much that is associated with regulating and controlling women’s bodies, and that narrative starts at home. And then you go out into your community and society and the narrative gets perpetuated, and you realize that you get sexualized by society at large too, especially as a person of color.

Resistance as Pleasure

Host: And finally, in what ways can our resistance be more than what we are allowed? Is there a place for pleasure and joy, for us and our communities?

Louise
Finding pleasure as resistance and resistance in pleasure, first for me there is this idea of the guerrilla filmmaking or the action of filming when you’re not supposed to or when someone told you not to, which is the case for a lot of women and queer filmmakers in the world right now. For example, in Lebanon, which is a cinema scene that I know very well, most of the lesbian stories that I’ve seen were shot by students in very short formats with “no production value” as the west would say – meaning with no money, because of the censorship that happens on an institutional level, but also within the family and within the private sphere. I would think that filming whatever, but also filming pleasure and pleasure within lesbian storytelling is an act of resistance in itself. A lot of times, just taking a camera and getting someone to edit and someone to act is extremely hard and requires a lot of political stance.

Lindiwe
I have a rape support group. I’m trying to assist women to reintegrate themselves from a sexual perspective: wanting to be intimate again, wanting to not let their past traumas influence so much how they move forward. It’s not an easy thing, but it’s individual. So I always start with understanding your body. I feel the more you understand and love and are proud of it, the more you are able to allow someone else into that space. I call it sensuality training, where I get them to start seeing themselves as not sexual objects, but as objects of pleasure and desire that can be interchangeable. So you’re worthy of receiving as well as giving. But that’s not only from a psychological point of view; it is physical. When you get out of the shower, you get out of the bath, and you’re putting lotion on your body, look at every part of your body, feel every part of your body, know when there are changes, know your body so well that should you get a new pimple on your knee, you are so aware of it because just a few hours ago it wasn’t there. So things like that where I kind of get people to love themselves from within, so they feel they are worthy of being loved in a safe space, is how I gear them towards claiming their sexuality and their desire.

Manal
You know we began to see women coming from Nablus, from Jerusalem, from Ramallah, even from occupied 48, who have to drive for 3-4 hours just to come to join the protests. After that we tried to go to other places, talk with women, tell them that they don’t have to be shy, that they should just believe in themselves and that there is nothing wrong in what we are doing. You can protect yourself, so where is the wrong in participating or in joining? Once I asked some women, “why are you joining?” And they said, “if the Tamimi women can do it, we can do it also.” To be honest I was very happy to hear this because we were like a model for other women. If I have to stand for my rights, it should be all my rights, not just one or two. We can’t divide rights.

Le 14e Forum a pour thème « Réalités féministes: notre pouvoir en action ».

Nous concevons les Réalités féministes comme différentes façons d’exister et d’être qui nous révèlent ce qui est possible, au mépris et malgré les systèmes de pouvoir dominants, et en résistance à ces derniers. Nous concevons ces réalités féministes comme des revendications et des incarnations d’espoir et de pouvoir, et comme des réalités multidimensionnelles, dynamiques et ancrées dans des contextes et des moments historiques spécifiques. 

En savoir plus sur les réalités féministes

🎯 Deckgame: Organize. Strategize. Mobilize.

A hands-on deckgame for collectives to explore feminist economic alternatives and systems of care as crisis response. This deckgame is for all movements navigating global climate crises through play and strategy based on real-life scenarios. A creative avenue to strategize in meetings, workshops, and community gatherings!

Coming soon

Accessibility and Health

Continuez à explorer Incarnations transnationales

Cette édition du journal, en partenariat avec Kohl : a Journal for Body and Gender Research (Kohl : une revue pour la recherche sur le corps et le genre) explorera les solutions, propositions et réalités féministes afin de transformer notre monde actuel, nos corps et nos sexualités.

Explorer

Nous avons toujours veillé à ce que nos Forums soient développés conjointement avec nos partenaires, nos mouvements et nos groupes prioritaires.

Pour cette édition 2020, nous visons à approfondir et renforcer cet esprit et cette pratique de co-création et de collaboration. Nous reconnaissons également la nécessité d’améliorer l’équilibre entre l’inclusion de nombreuses voix et les expériences, tout en laissant aux participant-e-s et au personnel la possibilité de respirer, faire une pause et profiter de certains temps d’arrêt.

Ce Forum sera différent des diverses façons suivantes: 

• Nous aurons beaucoup moins d’activités sur le Forum car nous voulons que les personnes aient le temps de s’impliquer, d’expérimenter, d’assimiler, de se parler, etc. C’est un élément fondamental à la communication: vous pouvez venir au Forum, être très impliqué-e et actif-ve et n’animer aucune activité organisée (ou “session”). 
• Nous aurons des espaces ouverts - au moins une après-midi entière sans activité organisée - mais aussi des espaces physiques disponibles sur toute la durée du Forum pour que les personnes puissent organiser elles-mêmes des réunions, etc.  
• Nous avons un Comité « contenu et méthodologie » composé de féministes provenant de différentes régions et possédant une expertise sur les méthodologies participatives pour nous soutenir, et encourager tou-te-s ceux-celles menant des activités sur le Forum à utiliser des formats créatifs et attrayants.

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La Convocatoria de Actividades enumera una lista de sugerencias para formatos y metodologías. Sé creativx y asegúrate de leer la sección «Lo que debes saber».

النمرة.

Veuillez visiter la page « Financement » pour obtenir des idées et vous inspirer sur les façons dont financer votre participation au prochain Forum, y compris pour vous informer sur le soutien limité que l’AWID sera en mesure de fournir. 

Expected Resolutions Relevant to Gender and Sexuality

• The rights of the child (EU & GRULAC)

• Birth registration and the right of all to recognition as a person before the law (Mexico, Turkiye)

• Adequate housing as a component of the right to an adequate standard of living and the right to non-discrimination in this context (Germany, Finland)

• Negative impact of unilateral coercive measures on the enjoyment of human rights (Non-Aligned Movement)

• Effects of foreign debt and other international  financial obligations on the enjoyment of human rights (mandate renewal) (Cuba)

• Rights of persons with disabilities, digital technologies, and inclusive disability infrastructure (Mexico, New Zealand)

• Rights of the child (focus: Children in armed conflict) (Uruguay on behalf of a group of States from Latin America and the Caribbean and European Union)

• Right to work (Egypt, Greece)

• Right to food (Cuba)

• Promotion of the enjoyment of cultural rights of all and respect for cultural diversity (Cuba)

• Human rights situation in the Occupied Palestinian Territory, including East Jerusalem and the obligation to ensure accountability and justice (Organisation of Islamic Cooperation)

• Right of the Palestinian people to self-determination (Organisation of Islamic Cooperation)

•  Israeli settlements in the Occupied Palestinian Territory, including East Jerusalem and in the occupied Syrian Golan (Organisation of Islamic Cooperation)

Plus qu'un événement !

Le Forum international de l'AWID est un événement mondial qui offre aux participant·e·s une occasion unique de se rencontrer, tisser des alliances, de faire la fête et d’apprendre des autres dans une ambiance stimulante, riche en émotions et en toute sécurité.

De plus en plus, nous nous efforçons de penser le processus du Forum au-delà des limites de l’événement lui-même. Nous ouvrons des discussions avec des partenaires et renforçons des alliances tout au long de l’année. Nous essayons d’être au plus proches des mouvements locaux pour comprendre leurs difficultés et co-créer des solutions.

Le Forum de l’AWID un espace propice aux discussions en profondeur, qui repousse nos limites internes et externes et favorise le développement personnel et professionnel, en plus de renforcer nos mouvements pour la justice sociale, de genre et les droits des femmes.

Nous envisageons ce moment de rencontre comme une réponse à l’urgence de favoriser un engagement plus marqué et une action mieux concertée entre les organisations féministes, les défenseur·e·s des droits des femmes et les autres activistes de justice sociale. Pour nous, le Forum est plus qu’un événement. Il nourrit nos réflexions respectives et nous aide à cerner des initiatives concrètes dans lesquelles les mouvements féministes et peuvent s’engager avec d’autres acteurs·trices.

Au départ un événement national d’environ 800 personnes, le Forum rassemble aujourd'hui plus de 2 000 féministes, des dirigeant·e·s communautaires, des activistes de justice sociale et des bailleurs de fonds du monde entier. 

En savoir plus

Les Forums précédents

2016 : Horizons féministes : Construire un pouvoir collectif pour les droits et la justice (Costa de Sauipe, Brésil) 

Compte tenu de la complexité du monde d'aujourd'hui, le Forum de l'AWID 2016 ne s'est pas concentré sur un « problème » particulier mais a plutôt exploré comment créer des moyens efficaces de travailler ensemble !

Malgré le contexte difficile dans lequel s’est déroulé le Forum de 2016 (l’épidémie de Zika, la grève au ministère des Affaires étrangères brésilien, la destitution de la présidente Dilma Rousseff et l’instabilité qui a suivi), il a rassemblé plus de 1800 participant-e-s issu-e-s de 120 pays et territoires de toutes les régions du monde.

Ce qu’il s’est passé au Forum 2016:

• Pour 96 % des participant·e·s qui ont répondu à l’enquête d’évaluation du Forum, le Forum a représenté une source majeure d’inspiration et d’énergie.
• Quelque 98 % des participant·e·s ont considéré qu’il s’agissait d’un espace de rassemblement important pour les mouvements féministes et ont exprimé l’espoir que l’AWID continue d’organiser de tels forums.
• 59 % des répondant·e·s au sondage d’évaluation du Forum ont déclaré être très satisfai·e·s du Forum et 34 % assez satisfait·e·s.
• Plus de 150 sessions ont été organisées sous divers formats et sur une variété de sujets allant de l’intégrité physique et de la liberté corporelle, en passant par la violence de genre sur le lieu de travail et les stratégies visant à renforcer le pouvoir collectif.
• Le premier Forum des Féminismes noirs juste avant le Forum de l’AWID lui-même a rassemblé 250 féministes noires du monde entier pour co-créer un espace important afin de construire et de renforcer les relations transnationales et intergénérationnelles

Lisez en détail les accomplissement du Forum de l’AWID 2016 :

Téléchargez le rapport d’évaluation

2012 - Transformer le pouvoir économique pour avancer les droits des femmes et la justice (Istanbul, Turquie)

Le 12^e Forum de l’AWID s’est tenu à Istanbul en Turquie en 2012, avec pour thème central Transformer le pouvoir économique pour avancer les droits des femmes et la justice. Ce Forum fut le plus important et le plus diversifié de l’histoire, rassemblant quelque 2 239 activistes pour les droits des femmes en provenance de 141 pays différents. Parmi elles-eux, environs 65 % venaient de pays du Sud, près de 15 % étaient des jeunes femmes de 30 ans et moins, alors que 75 % participaient au Forum pour la première fois.  

Le Forum s’est focalisé sur la transformation du pouvoir économique pour faire progresser les droits des femmes et la justice en proposant plus de 170 activités incluant des ateliers de formation en économie féministe, en passant par toute une séries d’ateliers de discussion et autres tables rondes solidaires autour de 10 grandes questions cruciales.

Dans l’élan du Forum, nous avons transformé la page qui lui était dédiée en un outil multimédia en ligne qui intègre également les contenus générés par les participant-e-s sur toutes les composantes du Forum. 

Visitez l'archive web du Forum 2012

Tous les Forums

• 2016 : Horizons féministes : Construire un pouvoir collectif pour les droits et la justice (Costa de Sauipe, Brésil). Lire le résumé du rapport d'évaluation du Forum 2016
• 2012 : Transformer le pouvoir économique pour avancer les droits des femmes et la justice (Istanbul)
• 2008 : Le Pouvoir des mouvements (Le Cap, Afrique du Sud). Lisez le Rapport du Forum 2008
• 2005 : Comment survient le changement ? (Bangkok, Thaïlande)
• 2002 : Réinventer la mondialisation (Guadalajara, Mexique)
• 1999 : Propositions innovantes pour l’égalité et la justice (États-Unis)
• 1996 : L’après-Beijing : Des paroles aux actes (États-Unis)
• 1993 : Joindre nos forces pour développer des visions communes (États-Unis)
• 1991 : Travailler ensemble, apprendre ensemble : Un dialogue Nord-Sud (États-Unis)
• 1989-1990 : L’autonomisation mondiale des femmes (États-Unis)
• 1987 : Aller de l’avant : Propositions innovantes pour la recherche, l’action et les politiques de développement (États-Unis)
• 1985 : Femmes créatrices de richesse : Transformer le développement économique (États-Unis)
• 1983 : Les Femmes dans le développement (WID) (Washington D.C., États-Unis)

المانغو

يومَ دعتني أنجليكا وفابي لأكون القَيِّمة على تشكيلة نصوص شبقية من تحرير نسوة سود لم أكن أعرف ما يعنيه عملُ القيِّم. الشبق ومشتقاته، هذه فهمتها جيداً، لكن عمل القَيِّم...

اقرأ أكثر

Des partenaires mondiaux et régionaux nous ont déjà communiqué certaines idées de rassemblements préalables au Forum, dont nous vous ferons part sous peu. 

Si vous projetez d’organiser une réunion avant le Forum,  n’hésitez pas à nous le faire savoir !

Contactez-nous

Plusieurs belles choses ont émergé du Forum des féminismes noires (BFF, selon son acronyme anglais),  qui avait été organisé en 2016 par un Groupe consultatif et financé par l’AWID. À l’issue de ce BFF, certaines organisations indépendantes ont ainsi pu voir le jour, telles ques des organisations féministes noires au Brésil. Bien que le BFF n’aura pas lieu cette année, nous nous engageons à partager certains apprentissages clés avec toute personne intéressée à poursuivre le travail d'organisation féministe noire. 

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